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Thursday, March 11, 2010


This is me from the April issue of Ladies Home Journal magazine. That's right, I'm officially published.

Sure it's only 150 words, and it's pretty much the last page in the magazine, and in this picture I look like I'm straining under the weight of 25 pounds of meat, because I AM, and the roast on top kept rolling around, and all that balancing and lifting made me look like I need a laxative, and they edited out the burners on my stove, but not my flabby arms, and I look as pale as Eddie Munster, and people at work didn't even recognize me because I wasn't wearing my glasses. But, it's Ladies Home Journal, people!

And, at the very least, my kitchen was really clean for about 20 minutes.

If you want to pick up a copy, it's the one with Brooke Shields on the front. Which is kind of awesome, because now Brooke and I are like this. I gave her tips on posing.

Why was I in the magazine? Why was my kitchen clean for once? The back story is here. And, when you're done reading that, go read these.

Being Michael's Daddy, Suburban Scrawl, World of Weasels, A Look on the Random Side, Code Monkey Daddy, Double the Fun, Real Men Drive Minivans, Beautiful Wreck, Half Past Kissin' Time, D is for Dad, Nuclear Family Warhead, Joeprah, Big Bad Daddy Rant, Dear Mr. Man, The Busy Dad Blog, Get Off the Ground, The Devoted Dad, Knee Deep in Kids and Surprised Mom.

Because if not for them, I wouldn't have been juggling that roast.

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As soon as I saw the meat, I knew :-)

SO SO friggin awesome.

Hooray for meat!
Hooray for friends!
Hooray for friend's meat!
That's AWESOME! YAY for you!!

So, I'm totally, like, 1 degree away from Brooke now, right? :)
You TOTALLY are Martha!

Wow Momo! I'm so happy for you.

(that's a gorgeous picture of you)
Mmmm, meat.
Why on earth did they scrub out your burners? Looks really weird.
You are so adorable. I am going to buy it!
A pile of meat is the new fishnet stocking.

Also, there's something right in the universe where within a month, both of us have pictures on our blogs posing with meat. Meat, and therefore we, rule.
Congratulations!! That's fabulous. And give my love to Brookie. Hee.
AWESOME picture!

Is any of that the ground beef you keep threatening to throw at my head? :)


P.S. Will you sign my copy in August?
This is so cool! I'm going to buy the magazine and then go around to all my friends and say, "Look, I know this woman!"
The trip to your house, meeting you and your family and the ride home still bring a smile to my face.
And why do you want to throw ground beef at Melisa's head?
That is awesome! Congrats!
Let me be the first to say that if throwing ground beef at Melisa's head is something you feel strongly about, I would only ask that you season it first with the seasoning I sent you. There. The cat is out of the bag.

The restaurant manager in me is cringing looking at all the cross contamination issues going on in that picture; hell, why don't you balance a head of lettuce on top and contaminate all of the food groups?
how awesome is this?!!! I remember when they came to do the photo shoot I was like WHUH??? I dont know whats going on, but I bet you were totally busy texting Brooke.

Your arms are not flabby.

Why did they make your oven all weird?
I DARE you to take a road trip to my house, just to throw meat at my head.

Double Dog Dare you. (and bring your double dogs, too.)
Here I was, thinking you'd be showing some cleavage, after your comments on the photo shoot.

Hooray. I can't wait to see the article.
I love that they did this for you. I love that the story of what they did reached even further. I love that lives will be touched that none of you who are in the story can even know in this life. Well done.

(I have a magazine to go buy, now...)
Um, Momo. You know you're on the web, too, right? I mean, outside of your blog?

Running out to buy myself a copy.
You are so much cooler than me. It's true.
Didn't I just finish telling you how you rule everything? 'Cause I'm pretty sure I just told you that you rule everything. Now I have a picture of you balancing a roast that PROVES that you rule everything. Rock on, sister!
whatever... you look fabulous and this is so cool! you are bench pressing meat!
Wow! That is totally awesome!
Congrats, Momo! I'm picking up the issue this weekend! So happy for you and I love the backstory. That's love!
You look wonderful, albeit very, very white!

Thanks for the love.
awesome!!!! I can't wait to grab a copy and show the checkout girl that I KNOW you! right? :)
You look awesome, and why in the world did they take out your burners? Maybe someone will send you a new stove--they'll feel bad that you have only one burner to cook all of that meat on!
Amazing!! I'm going to go read it. (Why edit out the burners? That's just weird.)
So very cool! You're in a mazagine! With meat, and a hobbled stovetop! Awesome. And thanks for the link!
"Congrats!", He said, tinged with envy!

So awesome, you look fantastic!

(Meat really brings out your eyes.)
Ladies Home Journal. That's some sort of mom code for Maxim, right?

Very cool! When I get my copy I'm going to draw the rest of the burners back on :)
OMG OMG OMG OMG. Im soooo excited and happy for you! This is the best news EVER. xoxoxoxooxxoox
this is fabulous!! congratulations! I will look for it online since LHJ can't swim across the Atlantic... :(
I called my sister when I received my copy last week and I was like, "It's MOMO!!!"

That story touched my heart last year so much.
Okay so I have a funny story! Yesterday, I was in our grocery store, Marsh, picking up MEAT! for my sloppy joe recipe that I'm making for a bunch of people tonight. So I'm with Curt and we're standing in the checkout and he's holding the basket full of like, 10lbs of MEAT! and I'm like, "I have to find LHJ! My friend Momo is in it!" and he's all "Is this one of your blog people?" I'm like, "YES! DUH!" And he rolls his eyes and stands there, while I am furiously thumbing through this magazine to find you and he's like, "I'm going to start checking out now.." in his impatient voice, and then FINALLY, I found you, and I was all "Look honey, look!" And he goes...

"Oh, she is so cute!"

HEH. So that's my story. And now you sit on our coffee table :)

You are cute, and it was a totally adorable pic!
Wow, I knows sumbuddy famis!

Hey, all kidding aside! Thts wonderful!

I'll hve to check it out! Will you autograph my copy?
Personally I think it's extravagant to have an entire stove with just one burner. I'm equally repulsed and impressed.

And if you and Brooke Shields are LIKE THIS (I hate that there aren't itallics in here)...anyway if you and Brooke Shields are LIKE THIS and you and I are also LIKE THIS then me and Brooke Shields are LIKE THIS.

Super cool! Congrats on making a real live magazine appearance.
That is awesome. I will never be in the ladies home journal so I am going to live vicariously through you.
So awesome!!
At is So Awesome!!! I'm gonna have to get my first ever copy...for my wife to read of course :)
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