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Momo Fali's: Pain

Sunday, November 8, 2009


On Friday afternoon I sat down to write this post, but I couldn't come up with the right words. I tried again yesterday and here I am again, on Sunday evening, and I am still at a complete loss. It is, quite simply, too painful to trivialize with my voice.

So it has come to this. At a time when there is nothing I can say, I will simply state the facts.

* On February 17, 2004, my niece, Madison, died just shy of her first birthday. My son was too young to comprehend her passing. My daughter was five years old and understood all too well that her cousin was gone.

* On March 1, 2004, a schoolmate of my daughter was run over in our preschool parking lot. Michael was three years old. Telling my daughter that he had been killed in an accident was one of the hardest things I've ever done.

* On September 1, 2007, one of my son's preschool classmates passed away. John was five, as was my son. My son was far too young to say goodbye to a friend and his friend was far too young to die.

* On October 15, 2009, a little girl who attended school with my daughter and whose family goes to our church lost her battle with Fanconi Anemia. Samantha was 11.

* And last week we learned that a nine year old at the school has an inoperable brain tumor and isn't expected to live more than a year. A girl who used to play on my daughter's soccer team and who, until last week, seemed perfectly fine.

Another child. I can not bear it.

I have not told my children yet. My 10 year old daughter and my seven year old son shouldn't have to deal with losing their friends. Not so many of them. Not in the midst of childhood which is supposed to be carefree.

Not again.

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I am so so sorry. I wish you didn't have to talk to your kids about something so sad again. Sending thoughts and prayers.
Oh honey. I am so sorry. Oh goodness.

In the very long run, they will grow up to be more caring and compassionate adults because they understand loss.

But that's only because it cuts so deep. It's so hard. Please tell them that someone they don't know named Alison is wishing them a hug. Because--yeah. Just because. (And for you too.)
I still remember your tear-stained voice and what you said when you called me on the way home from the hospital that night in February 2004.

I remember the emails about each of the others, too. The fact of that statement, "each of the otherS" ... the fact that there are multiple children ... any children ... it's heart wrenching.

I've been praying for this girl and her family. :(
how absolutely heartbreaking each and every one of those losses were and are for all of you. :-( I'm so sorry.
Words are so inadequate at times like this. All I can say is I'm so sorry for your pain and for your children's pain. The death of a child is especially heart wrenching, but having to say goodbye to so many children, I can't imagine. Again, I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry. :(

I am so sorry. I still vividly remember childhood friends who died. I also, of course, vividly remember my children's childhood friends who have passed. The loss of a child is always so painful to accept.

Sending big hugs to you and your family!
Momo. I love that you're not attempting to hide anything from your if they wouldn't eventually figure things out. (My parents always tried to hide the painful things in life from didn't work.)

Sending you and your children loving thoughts.
Oh I am so sorry to hear this, death is horrible, but in children it is heartrenching. Sorry your kids have to go through this. I will pray that you can have strength and they can have comfort. sorry.
Oh, Momo my heart goes out to you and your sweet children. No child should have their innocence shattered by such horrific things.

I am so very sorry.

Sending everyone in your life strength and prayers.
my heart breaks for you and the families of those children.

this shouldn't be allowed.
it just isn't just isn't right. so horrible to fathom. I'm so sorry for all the hurt.
That's so heartbreaking. I'm so sorry.
So much loss. Janet is right, it shouldn't be allowed.

Hugs to you.
It's not fair, To the parents, the families or the friends. It's not fair that children have their innocence taken away so soon by the ugly facts of life. It's not fair that you have to comfort them through such tragedy. Yet, it happens anyway. I'm sorry that this is happening.
Oh that is so terribly sad. Your heart must be so heavy, knowing that your children will have to face this, and knowing that the parents of those other children have such a huge burden to bear. It's just not fair.
I am so sorry.
Oh, momma. . .my heart is breaking with you.
Oh, Momo, I am so sorry. So very very sorry.
Damn, that's just awful. My heart goes out to your family and the families of those suffering those losses. I hope your children can one day use these experiences to appreciate the preciousness of life and the family surrounding them. Hug a little tighter, and laugh a little harder.
Oh my gosh. That is horrible to have so many tragedies happen to people your children know and love.

I can't even imagine how to approach the subject with my kids. Thankfully, I haven't had to yet.

My prayers are with you.
I am so very sorry Momo. It is so unfair.
Oh, hon...I'm so very sorry. Hugs to you...
So young, and so tragic. A parent should never out live their child.
You shouldn't have to lose all of these children either. I am so sorry.
I am so sorry. You must want to hold your children so tightly and not let them leave your side.

Those poor babies--those children. Those parents and families.

My heart couldn't take all of that. You must be so sad.
Our experience with death has been with the older generation, I can not even imagine how furious it would make me to have to deal a list like this.

I am so sorry for those families and heart wrenching.
My grandmother, who raised me, died when I was 15. I'm 31 and still trying to get over it, or at least be able to talk about her without crying.
I hope with all my heart your children learn how to be strong. I hope something good comes out of all this. I was overprotected as a child, never thought people could just disappear forever, and it's scarred me for life...
Lots of love for you and your kids. I mean that.
I am so so sorry. I don't have any words of wisdom or nor can I find any words that could possibly comfort.
I know, my dear, I know. We both do.

Oh sweetie, I'm so so sorry.
My hugs, love and prayers to you. To your kids. and to all of those families.
I'm so sorry. I have a three year old and so am lucky I have not had to deal with anything like telling him bad news yet. How heartbreaking to break your child's heart. (Hugs)
::hugs:: I'm so sorry to hear about these tragedies. You and your children should not have to deal with such things.
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