Momo Fali's: Frankly, Scarlett...

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Frankly, Scarlett...

I turned 38 last week. During the last month I experienced the following. I am sharing this with you so you will recognize the signs that you're nearing forty...

- If you pull a shoulder muscle in your sleep.

- Which leads to your husband buying you a Tempur-Pedic pillow for your birthday and you're actually happy about it.

- If you find a gray hair.

- In your chin.

- If you fall asleep on the couch at roughly the same time you went out to keg parties in college.

- When you go shoe shopping and consider how comfortable the high-heels are, versus how high the high-heels are.

- If someone asks, "Is that a tattoo?"

- And you reply, "No, it's a spider vein."

And, you really know you're nearing forty...

- When you take all of the above and completely own it.

- Because the best thing about getting older is knowing that life is too short to give a damn.

Labels: Getting Old, Ramblings

# posted by Momo Fali : 6:55 AM

Comments:

AMEN SISTAH!! Happy Belated Birthday, you youngin'! Wait until AFTER 40...it's all downhill now!

# posted by

Mrs. Schmitty : June 7, 2009 at 8:56 AM

i will be 40 in august so i totally know what you mean! i find myself stepping back from my register at work on occasion so i can see it a little better. these 40 year old eyes are the only things i'm not happy about! i don't want reading glasses, and i'm planning to whine about it! the rest...i totally own!

# posted by

Natalie : June 7, 2009 at 9:06 AM

*When you buy cosmetics for "mature" skin.

I laughed out loud at your list - I do the same things. 40 is the new 80, apparently!

Happy Birthday Momo!

# posted by

anya : June 7, 2009 at 9:08 AM

Wait...38? (checkingTwitterprofilepic)

38?

Kidding, right?

Lawd, i had you at about, oh, 32ish...is that wrong of me? (grin)

Happy Birthday, Momo!

# posted by

Irish Gumbo : June 7, 2009 at 9:12 AM

YES, YES, YES!!!
I finally stopped caring what others think when I turned 40 in November. It's a freeing feeling, isn't it?

# posted by

Melisa Wells : June 7, 2009 at 9:22 AM

so funny 'cause it's so true! although the spider veins bother me. I don't care who else has them, I just don't want them! You're so funny Momo...

# posted by

Birdie : June 7, 2009 at 9:25 AM

Happy birthday Momo.

I was prepared for that last expect for spiders veins. Really? Oh man... must start researching how to stop those from happening too soon. Im just a couple of years behind you.

# posted by

OHmommy : June 7, 2009 at 9:28 AM

Happy Birthday! I love your last line, so true!

# posted by

Everyday Goddess : June 7, 2009 at 9:53 AM

Happy Birthday.

Here's to not giving a damn.

I only just graduated my twenties, but I was fascinated by my first spider vein. Seriously, it's like a little map! My husband's response, "Why did you have to show me? I wouldn't have noticed."

# posted by

Sadia : June 7, 2009 at 10:16 AM

I may need to do one of these lists now that I'm nearly 50. The pulling muscle thing? Even I haven't done that... yet.

# posted by

Tara R. : June 7, 2009 at 10:41 AM

Awesome post. Hilarious. Happy Birthday (a little late).

# posted by

Rhea : June 7, 2009 at 10:56 AM

Preach it, sister!

You're lucky that your spider vein looks like a tattoo - I look like I got kicked in the shins ;)

Happy, happy birthday!

# posted by

Angella : June 7, 2009 at 11:08 AM

Happy birthday, girlfriend!

Having survived the apocalypse and lived to tell about it, very happy to hear that you're owning it.

We own a coma couch, that's my excuse. And spiders? Honey, I've got highway basketweaves on my gams... but you'd better not look in Chicago...

# posted by

Karen MEG : June 7, 2009 at 12:10 PM

I'm already in bed by 10pm and I'm not even 30 yet. By my forties, I'll probably turn in before happy hour.

# posted by

Stacey : June 7, 2009 at 12:11 PM

I like your moxy!

# posted by

WeaselMomma : June 7, 2009 at 12:33 PM

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say yeah, I'd still totally hit that shit.

Happy birthday, my dear friend!

# posted by

Mr Lady : June 7, 2009 at 3:08 PM

I read growing older always beats the alternative---dying young.
You still look great!

# posted by

Miss Lisa : June 7, 2009 at 4:16 PM

Amen. And by the way--my dad got his first gray hair (on his head, admittedly) at 14. That is not a typo.

# posted by

AlisonH : June 7, 2009 at 4:47 PM

Hilarious!

I am in my mid thirties and I think I will just about crap my pants when/ if I find a gray hair...in MY chin!

LOL

# posted by

meleah rebeccah : June 7, 2009 at 5:23 PM

That last line - exactly! (I am turning 38 this week. And it doesn't bother me either. Even though I tell my children I am 21.)

# posted by

Mum-me : June 7, 2009 at 6:08 PM

I love your attitude! Congrats on being 38 and embracing it!

# posted by

SurprisedMom : June 7, 2009 at 6:54 PM

A..flipping MEN.. Happy Birthday Momo..

PS.. I have gray hairs in my eyebrows.. :)

# posted by

Kim : June 7, 2009 at 6:57 PM

Oh so true. I've even found grey eyelashes and ...um... some down there. It's time for Nice and Easy!

# posted by

Lynn : June 7, 2009 at 7:03 PM

Hee hee hee ;-) damn woman. love your attitude, adore you writing and holy cow.. LOVE IT!!
Happy LATE Birthday (again!)

# posted by

Rachel : June 7, 2009 at 7:04 PM

LOL...nice to know I am in good company! I will be 39 in Dec...Happy belated Birthday!

# posted by

Unknown : June 7, 2009 at 8:13 PM

What if many of those things are true but you are only 30? Can you be depressed then?

# posted by

Caroline D. : June 7, 2009 at 10:44 PM

Even though I turned 38 YEARS ago (3), I do hear you on this one, sister. How do you think it felt when my childrens' estimated age for me was -- get this -- 67?!?

Anyway, happy birthday!!! ;)

# posted by

BabyShrink : June 7, 2009 at 10:55 PM

I turn 37 in a few days...so if you find more than one gray hair in your chin, what does that mean?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

# posted by

Blah Blah Blah : June 8, 2009 at 12:53 AM

happy birthday. and i can tell you that you aren't old until you find a gray hair ... uh ... well ... um ... well, yeah. there.

# posted by

the planet of janet : June 8, 2009 at 2:56 AM

Turned 40 last year, screeching towards 41: this was a great post! So true. Except I hated my temper pedic pillow...

# posted by

And I'll Raise You 5 : June 8, 2009 at 9:28 AM

I turned 38 last November and these are SO true. Just did the pull-shoulder-while-sleeping thing last week. My brain's starting to play tricks on me too. Last week I couldn't find my sunglasses anywhere--I figured I left them in Starbucks or something. I later drove into a parking garage and, um, it was SO dark in there. Ay yi yi.....

Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

# posted by

Valerie : June 8, 2009 at 11:01 AM

Happy Birthday!!

I have all sorts of shoulder-related problems from sleeping, too!! Those contoured pillows are a God-send!

# posted by

Anonymous : June 8, 2009 at 11:05 AM

I haven't gotten there yet, but I'm on my way.. LOL

I just found my grey hair...and I was pretty excited about it.

# posted by

Briya : June 8, 2009 at 11:06 AM

Yep, 37 in April and I totally hear you. "What do you mean the movie doesn't start until 9:20? I can't be up that late. Let's just wait until it comes out on Netflix."

# posted by

Kori : June 8, 2009 at 12:35 PM

Just two years ago I was laughing at my boss because he couldn't read documents where the font was too small. Now I'm finding out for myself just how quickly eyesight can deteriorate once you pass 40, even if you think you're being careful.

You have the right attitude: embrace it, because it's what you get whether you like it or not.

# posted by

Tom : June 8, 2009 at 12:51 PM

I hear you. Turning 40 has been tough for me. Could be a coincidence that it happened only a couple of months after my son was born, but probably not.

# posted by

James (SeattleDad) : June 8, 2009 at 3:19 PM

I'm 32 and pretty much right there with you. Write some more about hairs in the chin please.

And thanks for flashing the badge for The People's Party! See you there!

# posted by

Megan : Velveteen Mind : June 8, 2009 at 4:50 PM

Funny list. I already fall asleep on the couch early in the night and I have gray hairs appearing everywhere. I am only 31.

# posted by

Otter Thomas : June 8, 2009 at 5:21 PM

Happy Birthday, Momo!

Owning it is where it's at!

# posted by

Anonymous : June 8, 2009 at 11:34 PM

Happy late birthday, my dear... Good for you. That's all I have to say...

# posted by

Misty : June 9, 2009 at 12:46 AM

*standing ovation* I'm 36 and couldn't agree more!

# posted by

Putting the FUN in DysFUNctional : June 9, 2009 at 4:33 AM

Lol, I love it :)

# posted by

Jaina : June 9, 2009 at 6:54 PM

I have a spider vein tatoo, too!! (matching ones, in fact) :)

# posted by

Mrs4444 : June 10, 2009 at 11:08 AM

your TEH awesome no matter what age ;) we're birthday twins :)

and I LOVE YOUR NEW DESIGN. it is so hot. seriously.

# posted by

Anonymous : June 10, 2009 at 6:30 PM

i turned 40 in march. and when i tell you it gets worse...
zzzzz
oh...sorry. fell asleep.
happy belated!
xo

# posted by

melissa : June 11, 2009 at 2:39 PM

I turned 39 in May. I am going to publicly admit for the first time that I found a grey pubic hair. I sent hubby a tearful text. How the FECK did this happen?!?!? I can't have a grey couchie!! OOOOOOH MAH GAWD!! Getting old kinda sucks in the most unexpected ways. Oh and Happy Birthday!

# posted by

Lindy : June 15, 2009 at 9:36 AM

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