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How Not To Impress People

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Momo Fali's: How Not To Impress People

Monday, September 1, 2008

How Not To Impress People

Two days ago, we attended our niece's wedding in Virginia. The ceremony and reception were held at a beautiful and exclusive resort on the banks of the James River. I'm pretty sure they wanted to turn us away at the gate, because our Cadillac wasn't fancy enough.

The bride and the guests were gorgeous, decked out in clothes so fabulous that the sunset paled in comparison. Following the ceremony, the wedding party had photographs taken while we were treated to scrumptious hors d'oeuvres in truly lovely surroundings.

After finding out I have a love for something called "mushroom cigars" and even more love for something called an "open bar", it was time for the reception.

As we left the riverbank and stepped inside to the five-course, sit-down dinner, I grabbed my son's hand and told my daughter to follow behind.

We entered on the far end of the hall and zig-zagged through the crowd, looking for the table number that matched our place card. I nodded politely and said, "Excuse me", numerous times as the three of us wiggled around the room.

Little did I know that I should have been excusing my son's behavior, not mine, because when we arrived at our table my daughter said, "Mom! Your son smacked the butt of every person we passed by!"

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Comments:
LOL Couldn't she have mentioned that a little sooner?
 
My kind of kid!! That's exactly how I am after Mushroom Cigars and an open bar at cocktail hour!!
 
"your son"

bwahahahahahahahah!

The life of the party eh?
 
I just spit beer all over my screen.

Oh my hell Momo!! That is fantastic.

I am giggling insanely right now.
 
Ni-ice. What is it with 6 year old boys and them smacking everyone on their hiney? I can't even blame Jake's obsession with it on women's volleyball....THAT just reemphasized his desire to do it even more.....
 
He is a PLAYER...
 
What he thinks is funny now will mortify him up one side and down the other later. Heh. Teenagerhood: the parents' revenge.
 
Oh my! Don't you just love when kids give us these proud parent moments?
 
OH!! I can just hear the converstaions later..."Who was that woman who was smacking everyone's Butt through the crowd??" "She said excuse me, and then I got smacked! The nerve!"
I LOVE your son!! I would have sat them down at the table, and headed straight back to the open bar.
 
And I bet each and every one of them got a kick out of it! :)

Welcome home!
 
bwahahahahahahhha!!!!
 
I love cheeky little boys!!
 
He ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!
 
HAHAHHAHAAAAAA!

If he smacked my butt, I would have scooped him, changed the seating chart and made him my partner in crime for the night. That kid is so awesome.
 
LOL ooooo to funny! awww children are just so precious!
 
I am in love with your son! He is so adorable, and so funny!

*heres to open bars every where!*
 
What? Is he in training to be a professional football player or something???

Hilarious!
 
Well done young man, well done!
 
Totally loving it; sounds like my family!
 
Hilarious (only because it happened to you and not me). Aren't boys great?
 
He's made his presence known ;)
 
I am so glad I was not drinking anything when I read tht last line! That is too funny.
 
Hee hee, I bet they all moved though. :D
 
LOL Too funny!
 
HIL-arious! Boys learn all too quick how to be icky men. LOL I could see mine doin' the SAME thing!
 
That is hilarious! I fear that I too am raising a butt-smacker. But a crowded wedding? That's hard core!
 
OMG that was funny. My son is not a butt smacker but a boob toucher. I think I breastfed him too long (9 Mos) he has a love for boobs, just like his dad.
 
well at least you got a good blog post out of it
 
OH MY GOSH. No way... That's hilarious... Sad I missed THAT wedding...
 
oh my gosh! And she waited that long to tell you??? *L* you guys are so hilarious!
 
Is this the boy who also says unexpected things? You never said he did unexpected things too!
 
That's my boy!!!
 
I want to party with that kid!!!
 
Laughing so hard I'm darn near crying. Love that boy!
 
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